This past Sunday I had the chance to share my story at church. Here is the link to listen to it...
http://restoresby.com/teachings/
It is labeled "Ryan's Story"
I hope it encourages you as Christmas draws near.
Friday, December 20, 2013
Sunday, December 1, 2013
A thankful heart
As I sit with my beautiful wife and amazing son (and my awesome daughter), I can't help but think of all the things I have to be thankful for. Not only do I have a great family but today (and last night) I was surrounded by my parents and brothers and sisters and niece and nephews and friends that have been around me to celebrate another year in the books.
As I enjoy my birthday I thank God that I am still here to enjoy His creation.
Just a few days ago many people gathered with friends and family to celebrate thanksgiving. I had the joy of stretching it out an extra day, we area very thankful family. I was able to spend the days eating good food, playing some football, and hanging with friends and family.
By now many people know Meagan had a sonogram last Tuesday and we were able to see our pretty little daughter- Hope Victory Twilley. We are excited for the spring when we get to hold her. At first Life was a little upset because he thought the baby was a boy. After some explaining he came around to the idea of a sister, he even refers to her room as "Hope's room". He is going to be a great big brother.
Going back a few more days to Saturday, I was honored to have a second benefit thrown for me. Thank you so much Stacey, Meghan, Suzanne, and Caty. You all did a great job getting together such a great auction and show! I was blown away by everyone coming out to show support.
On top of all of this, as if my heart wasn't full enough, I got some results back from my last checkup. This test counts the number of cancerous cells in my blood, in august this number was 900 something out of 1000. After only a couple months of my new med, the number is now down to 15 out of 1000. This is a huge improvement! I am thankful that God is allowing things to improve and I look forward to seeing what He is going to do next.
As I enjoy my birthday I thank God that I am still here to enjoy His creation.
Just a few days ago many people gathered with friends and family to celebrate thanksgiving. I had the joy of stretching it out an extra day, we area very thankful family. I was able to spend the days eating good food, playing some football, and hanging with friends and family.
By now many people know Meagan had a sonogram last Tuesday and we were able to see our pretty little daughter- Hope Victory Twilley. We are excited for the spring when we get to hold her. At first Life was a little upset because he thought the baby was a boy. After some explaining he came around to the idea of a sister, he even refers to her room as "Hope's room". He is going to be a great big brother.
Going back a few more days to Saturday, I was honored to have a second benefit thrown for me. Thank you so much Stacey, Meghan, Suzanne, and Caty. You all did a great job getting together such a great auction and show! I was blown away by everyone coming out to show support.
On top of all of this, as if my heart wasn't full enough, I got some results back from my last checkup. This test counts the number of cancerous cells in my blood, in august this number was 900 something out of 1000. After only a couple months of my new med, the number is now down to 15 out of 1000. This is a huge improvement! I am thankful that God is allowing things to improve and I look forward to seeing what He is going to do next.
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Packed house
So last night was amazing. Lauren and Charlie did a great job puting last night's benefit together for my family and I, Tunes for Twilley at Vinny's was a huge success. I got to see a packed restaurant full of people helping us out, the bands that played were excellent, and I got to see a lot of friends.
I could not believe how many people (many whom I did not even know) came out to show their support. I am continually being amazed by the love and generosity of the people who are willing to help us out.
To you who have given money, been praying and helped out with things like groceries and grass cutting- thank you.
And now for a health update. Now that we figured out the dosage that seems to be working for me, the FDA has pulled my med due to problems it has been causing with the older population with a history of heart problems.
My doctor, who is a leader in cml study and treatment, was on top of things and did a lot paper work and set up a clinical trial for me. This way I am able to stay of the med and not have to go through the fun times of trying to get my body adapted to another med.
I still believe that God is healer. He is also provider.
When teaching his disciples how to pray, Jesus prayed for God's kingdom to come and his will be done on earth as it is in Heaven. A few years later John was given revelation of things to come. In this revelation God painted a picture of Heaven and how Heaven and Earth will be when Gods kingdom takes over.
Revelation 21:4
He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more. There will be no mourning, crying, or pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”
I pray that God's kingdom would take place in my body and life as well as in my family, my church, and all over this area. Would you join me in this prayer
Sunday, October 20, 2013
Looking up
This past Thursday I had a good checkup at Hopkins. Usually we look at my blood counts and see how much lower they have gotten, but this time we were able to see the counts coming back up towards the normal range.
Since changing the dosage of my medication, my white and red counts have been able to come up on their own and my platelets are almost in the normal range (which hasn't been anywhere close to normal for at least 6 months. We are still watching the count of the cancer cells- they have come down a lot since starting this med but I am still not close to remission yet.
This was great news and as my nurse practitioner was going over the numbers I was amazed. Many people (some of who I do not even know) have been praying for me and I appreciate it because I know that God hears His people. My prayer has been that God would be glorified through whatever happens to me. He is working, and I am still believing He will heal me completely.
God is good and He can do all things. Sometimes people have to go through some rough situations but they can turn out for good. Think about Paul in the New Testament- he was close to death many times, shipwrecked on multiple occasions, and many other bad things happened to him BUT through all of it he was able to share God's message of love and redemption through Jesus Christ to much of the known world at that time.
For the past month or two I haven't been feeling up to doing much because of being sick or sore from meds or biopsies, but the past few days I have felt more like myself. I was able to go surfing with a couple guys. It was a real treat to be able to get out in the water and enjoy the beauty of God's creation.
Since changing the dosage of my medication, my white and red counts have been able to come up on their own and my platelets are almost in the normal range (which hasn't been anywhere close to normal for at least 6 months. We are still watching the count of the cancer cells- they have come down a lot since starting this med but I am still not close to remission yet.
This was great news and as my nurse practitioner was going over the numbers I was amazed. Many people (some of who I do not even know) have been praying for me and I appreciate it because I know that God hears His people. My prayer has been that God would be glorified through whatever happens to me. He is working, and I am still believing He will heal me completely.
God is good and He can do all things. Sometimes people have to go through some rough situations but they can turn out for good. Think about Paul in the New Testament- he was close to death many times, shipwrecked on multiple occasions, and many other bad things happened to him BUT through all of it he was able to share God's message of love and redemption through Jesus Christ to much of the known world at that time.
For the past month or two I haven't been feeling up to doing much because of being sick or sore from meds or biopsies, but the past few days I have felt more like myself. I was able to go surfing with a couple guys. It was a real treat to be able to get out in the water and enjoy the beauty of God's creation.
Friday, October 11, 2013
Home Sweet Home
Monday morning I headed to Hopkins for a check up because I had been having fevers off and on for 5 days. As I was meeting with my nurse practitioner it was decided I would be admitted to be treated for infection and so they could keep a close eye on me. I did not want to hear this. I do not enjoy being stuck in a hospital.
For the next few days I received IV antibiotics and they seemed to start changing things right away. The doctors wanted to check my bone marrow to make sure the fevers and shakes I had experienced were from an infection and not signs the leukemia had been acting up.
The biopsy did not go well. My doctor ended up taking off his white jacket and was drenched in sweat when it was all over an hou and a half longer than it should have taken. Because of my tough hip They were unable to get a complete biopsy but from what they got they could tell it wasn't the leukemia acting up.
We had to wait 24 hours for those results to come through but once we got the word we were able to head home. This news made me happy, it was Thursday evening and I hadn't seen life since Sunday night. My heart was aching to see him again. Unfortunately I didn't get home till 11 so I wasn't till this morning when my heart was filled with joy as I was able to spend time with my son.
During this week Meagan and I have experienced much love. Thank you all for giving to us and helping us out financially, thank you all who have been praying, and thank those of you who have sent food. I also would like to say how great the nurses and techs and support staff were at Hopkins, so compassionate and helpful.
Now that I am home I need to be careful in crowds and around sick people. I am still on antibiotics for about a week and we lowered the dose of my cancer treatment so my blood counts can come up some.
I am glad to be home.
For the next few days I received IV antibiotics and they seemed to start changing things right away. The doctors wanted to check my bone marrow to make sure the fevers and shakes I had experienced were from an infection and not signs the leukemia had been acting up.
The biopsy did not go well. My doctor ended up taking off his white jacket and was drenched in sweat when it was all over an hou and a half longer than it should have taken. Because of my tough hip They were unable to get a complete biopsy but from what they got they could tell it wasn't the leukemia acting up.
We had to wait 24 hours for those results to come through but once we got the word we were able to head home. This news made me happy, it was Thursday evening and I hadn't seen life since Sunday night. My heart was aching to see him again. Unfortunately I didn't get home till 11 so I wasn't till this morning when my heart was filled with joy as I was able to spend time with my son.
During this week Meagan and I have experienced much love. Thank you all for giving to us and helping us out financially, thank you all who have been praying, and thank those of you who have sent food. I also would like to say how great the nurses and techs and support staff were at Hopkins, so compassionate and helpful.
Now that I am home I need to be careful in crowds and around sick people. I am still on antibiotics for about a week and we lowered the dose of my cancer treatment so my blood counts can come up some.
I am glad to be home.
Sunday, October 6, 2013
It's been rough
Well after my check up and transfusion Thursday I was feeling good that I didn't have to go back to Hopkins for 2 whole weeks! I have been going weekly since starting my latest treatment. My only concern at that point was my low white count (these are the cells that fight infection and sickness).
So Friday came and so did another fever an that night I woke myself and Meagan up because I was shaking uncontrollably at 215 in the morning. By that point my fever was gone but I did have some pain. After calling the on call physician at Hopkins and taking some meds, I slowly was able to relax again. It is a weird feeling to not be cold yet have your body shaking and jaws chattering a ad not be able to stop.
The next morning came with another fever and more Tylenol. And thankfully it broke before my date with Meagan. We had to put off our anniversary celebration because of Meagan not feeling well and we needed the time to ourselves. We look back at our past 5 years of marriage and thank God for all we have been through because it has brought us closer to each other as well as closer to Him.
So the evening came around with yet another fever which died down some before bed but after sweating through the night I woke up to see 103.5 on the thermometer. Wonderful. It took the morning for it to come down with Tylenol and ice. I am so thankful for our family and friends who are here to help and pray and give. This morning Meagan and I needed help and our family came through. My mom picked up our grocery and Meagan's dad came and played with Life while Meagan and I tried to get ourselves together.
So what I thought would be 2 weeks turned into 4 days between visits. I will be heading back to Hopkins tomorrow to try to figure out what's going on and maybe
Know what to do next.
It is hard for me to be in a position where I can't work and provide for my family and I need help. Meagan is a federal employee who has to go to work during the government shutdown but won't get paid till it's all over with. So we could use some help and below are links you can check out. The biggest thing right now though is prayer.
I know medicine is great and everything but God is the one who can truly heal. He can use whatever he wants to do it- medicine, transfusion, or nothing at all. So please pray that He would heal.
www.youcaring.com/healingforryan
www.facebook.com/healingforryan
So Friday came and so did another fever an that night I woke myself and Meagan up because I was shaking uncontrollably at 215 in the morning. By that point my fever was gone but I did have some pain. After calling the on call physician at Hopkins and taking some meds, I slowly was able to relax again. It is a weird feeling to not be cold yet have your body shaking and jaws chattering a ad not be able to stop.
The next morning came with another fever and more Tylenol. And thankfully it broke before my date with Meagan. We had to put off our anniversary celebration because of Meagan not feeling well and we needed the time to ourselves. We look back at our past 5 years of marriage and thank God for all we have been through because it has brought us closer to each other as well as closer to Him.
So the evening came around with yet another fever which died down some before bed but after sweating through the night I woke up to see 103.5 on the thermometer. Wonderful. It took the morning for it to come down with Tylenol and ice. I am so thankful for our family and friends who are here to help and pray and give. This morning Meagan and I needed help and our family came through. My mom picked up our grocery and Meagan's dad came and played with Life while Meagan and I tried to get ourselves together.
So what I thought would be 2 weeks turned into 4 days between visits. I will be heading back to Hopkins tomorrow to try to figure out what's going on and maybe
Know what to do next.
It is hard for me to be in a position where I can't work and provide for my family and I need help. Meagan is a federal employee who has to go to work during the government shutdown but won't get paid till it's all over with. So we could use some help and below are links you can check out. The biggest thing right now though is prayer.
I know medicine is great and everything but God is the one who can truly heal. He can use whatever he wants to do it- medicine, transfusion, or nothing at all. So please pray that He would heal.
www.youcaring.com/healingforryan
www.facebook.com/healingforryan
Blog Sale
So here we go, I never had too much fun with yard sales but I usually don't have much to sell. I have prices with each picture and am willing to talk about it. If you are interested in anything contact me at rmtwilley@verizon.net. Any money made here is helping us get our home ready for our second child and helping with some of my pesky medical bills as well as household bills while out of work.
Just Dance
Wipeout
LetsTap
cooking mama
Friday, October 4, 2013
Thank you blood donors
Thank you blood donors. Over the past couple weeks I have had to receive a bag of platelets and 2 bags of red blood cells.
One of the side affects of my current medication is a drop in blood counts. So now my platelets and red cells are up I just have be careful with my lack of white cells- neutrophils in particular which are the infection fighting cells.
So you will not see me out in a crowd, people at AGH won't see me at work for a little while and I will be trying to dodge anyone I hear is sick. This won't be too difficult since I am a bit of an introvert anyway.
As far as my treatment, we will be checking the number of cancer cells floating around in my blood in two weeks. As far as home life, Meagan is still dealing with a lot of nausea from the pregnancy and Life has started using the potty. Very exciting!
My next post is going to be a bit of a fund raiser (as medical bills keep eating away at our bank account now more than usual). We have a lot of items around the house no longer need and that are taking up space we will need for our newest addition to the family who will be arriving in April. So instead of having a yard sale, I will be holding a blog sale. I hope to have it posted in the next few days but Meagan has put a few things on Facebook already. Be looking out for it and please help spread the news when it is posted.
One of the side affects of my current medication is a drop in blood counts. So now my platelets and red cells are up I just have be careful with my lack of white cells- neutrophils in particular which are the infection fighting cells.
So you will not see me out in a crowd, people at AGH won't see me at work for a little while and I will be trying to dodge anyone I hear is sick. This won't be too difficult since I am a bit of an introvert anyway.
As far as my treatment, we will be checking the number of cancer cells floating around in my blood in two weeks. As far as home life, Meagan is still dealing with a lot of nausea from the pregnancy and Life has started using the potty. Very exciting!
My next post is going to be a bit of a fund raiser (as medical bills keep eating away at our bank account now more than usual). We have a lot of items around the house no longer need and that are taking up space we will need for our newest addition to the family who will be arriving in April. So instead of having a yard sale, I will be holding a blog sale. I hope to have it posted in the next few days but Meagan has put a few things on Facebook already. Be looking out for it and please help spread the news when it is posted.
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
Love
Love is such a wonderful thing and can look so different from one use to another. There is the love that Mae and I have for each other- the kind of love that shows itself through selfless sacrifice. This is love that is shown when she sits by my side as I am receiving treatment or having a painful test done. Then there is the love I have for my Life. Just being able to see him after a long 12 hour shift before I lay down fill my heart with joy.
Over the past two and a half years I have been able to receive love from many people Even in the past few weeks I have experienced love from friends and family and even strangers. People I don't even know have let me know they are praying for me. Those who I barely know have sent dinner. Friends have cut grass for me when I have been too sore to do it myself. Family has stepped up as Mae and I haven't been at our best. And many have told me to let them know what they can do for me.
To all of you who have shown love to my growing family and I, I would like to say thank you!
There is another love I have experienced- the love of the Father. My God, the one true god, the one who created the world and everything in as well as the whole universe, also created me. My creator, my God, my Father created me and you and wants to share his love with us- His children.
Here is the problem- because of our disobedience we separated ourselves from Him. Since there was nothing we could do about this, God came to earth and paid the debt of our disobedience through Christ Jesus. And because of this we can all experience the love of our Father.
Love is a beautiful thing and I thank God for sharing His love with us so we can share it with each other.
Over the past two and a half years I have been able to receive love from many people Even in the past few weeks I have experienced love from friends and family and even strangers. People I don't even know have let me know they are praying for me. Those who I barely know have sent dinner. Friends have cut grass for me when I have been too sore to do it myself. Family has stepped up as Mae and I haven't been at our best. And many have told me to let them know what they can do for me.
To all of you who have shown love to my growing family and I, I would like to say thank you!
There is another love I have experienced- the love of the Father. My God, the one true god, the one who created the world and everything in as well as the whole universe, also created me. My creator, my God, my Father created me and you and wants to share his love with us- His children.
Here is the problem- because of our disobedience we separated ourselves from Him. Since there was nothing we could do about this, God came to earth and paid the debt of our disobedience through Christ Jesus. And because of this we can all experience the love of our Father.
Love is a beautiful thing and I thank God for sharing His love with us so we can share it with each other.
Thursday, September 19, 2013
A lot has happened
So let me start with sharing this... In the midst of cancer and uncertainty with my health, God once again showed Meagan and I that He is in control and He still brings new life in the midst of it all. Meagan is pregnant with our second child! Our hearts are full of joy!
Here is an update of the last couple weeks. I had my second bone marrow biopsy and thankfully it went much better than the first, the pain was pretty much gone the next day. However, the results showed some blast (cancer) cells in the marrow. Along with that, my blood counts have been changing enough that my doctor put me on another treatment. So last week I started taking a new chemo daily.
So each of the treatments I have tried have had their own unique side effects. This one has given me the joy of aches and pains all over, fevers and chills, and a drop of platelets. But it has also brought down the blasts and the white count (which is a good thing). I had a checkup today and had to have a platelet transfusion.
Moving on from here I will be visiting Quest Diagnostics each week as well as a riding to Hopkins. Even though my care team, as well as the rest of the staff at Hopkins, is great (they all care and go the extra mile with everyone they help) I just don't like spending the day up there. If I do have to spend a few hours at a hospital though, Hopkins isn't that bad.
So as Meagan and I look at planning for the future, there are many questions and things to consider. My doctor said it would be smart for me not to continue working full time right now. (That in itself brings up a lot to consider) Then we have a new baby to plan and prepare for.
Even though we have a lot going on, and things are uncertain with my health and job and money, we still have a gift from God, our son Life, who is a reminder to us that God still speaks and creates life in the midst of death.
The other night we were eating out and at a table near us was a family with small kids including a small baby. As Life was looking, or rather staring, I asked him, "Who else is getting a little baby?" He replied, "Life." We are so excited, as a family, for what God is doing in our family.
Here is an update of the last couple weeks. I had my second bone marrow biopsy and thankfully it went much better than the first, the pain was pretty much gone the next day. However, the results showed some blast (cancer) cells in the marrow. Along with that, my blood counts have been changing enough that my doctor put me on another treatment. So last week I started taking a new chemo daily.
So each of the treatments I have tried have had their own unique side effects. This one has given me the joy of aches and pains all over, fevers and chills, and a drop of platelets. But it has also brought down the blasts and the white count (which is a good thing). I had a checkup today and had to have a platelet transfusion.
Moving on from here I will be visiting Quest Diagnostics each week as well as a riding to Hopkins. Even though my care team, as well as the rest of the staff at Hopkins, is great (they all care and go the extra mile with everyone they help) I just don't like spending the day up there. If I do have to spend a few hours at a hospital though, Hopkins isn't that bad.
So as Meagan and I look at planning for the future, there are many questions and things to consider. My doctor said it would be smart for me not to continue working full time right now. (That in itself brings up a lot to consider) Then we have a new baby to plan and prepare for.
Even though we have a lot going on, and things are uncertain with my health and job and money, we still have a gift from God, our son Life, who is a reminder to us that God still speaks and creates life in the midst of death.
The other night we were eating out and at a table near us was a family with small kids including a small baby. As Life was looking, or rather staring, I asked him, "Who else is getting a little baby?" He replied, "Life." We are so excited, as a family, for what God is doing in our family.
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Good news bad news
News can be awesome to the point of celebration (or in my case a statement saying "that's awesome" in a tone a degree more excited than my usual tone... My friends know what I am talking about) or it can be news that makes your heart sink. It may cause tears of joy or tears or sorrow or fear.
Yesterday when I woke up from my sleep a little after 3 pm (give me a break, I work night shift) I had received an email from my nurse practitioner at Hopkins saying my doctor wants me there for another bone marrow biopsy Friday (tomorrow) because my platelets have fallen again, as well as my red blood count, while my white count has risen. *that isn't a great sign for somebody with chronic meyloid leukemia*
So as I thought back to a month ago when I had my first bone marrow biopsy and even over the last two and a half years of fighting this joker, emotions began to rise, tears started to fall.
It's annoying. I don't know why I have to be such a "unique case" (although I have always seemed to be different than those around me) but I hope that God is able to use me and my story to help some people find hope and life through whatever they are dealing with. I am waiting for healing in a way that the only explanation can be "God did it."
As I am trying to fall asleep (unsuccessfully) I am reminded of Paul in the New Testament: here is a guy who after encountering Jesus left behind his entire life's work in Judaism to follow the Savior. His entire life changed. He was suddenly different from what he used to be and different from his old friends. Through this shift and change, God used Paul to spread the Good News of Salvation to the world, and more specifically to those who had been told before that there was no way to be made right with God. He was able to share Life (salvation, Jesus) with many through his "unique case." He left his life's work to follow after the very thing he was so desperately trying to put an end to: Christ's church.
So even as I am dreading the drill and needle going into my hip tomorrow and the uncomfortable feeling I will have the next couple weeks I find joy in the idea that through all I am going through I can bring hope and life to others. And this is true life: Jesus Christ came from heaven, fully man and fully God, and gave his own life as the ransom for all who believe and follow him. We were separated from God because of our disobedience but because the debt was paid we can have life forever with our Creator and Father.
Update: my primary doctor treated me for migraines and I haven't had to deal with that the past week or so. I am thinking I was getting a little stressed which caused the headache to start.
Yesterday when I woke up from my sleep a little after 3 pm (give me a break, I work night shift) I had received an email from my nurse practitioner at Hopkins saying my doctor wants me there for another bone marrow biopsy Friday (tomorrow) because my platelets have fallen again, as well as my red blood count, while my white count has risen. *that isn't a great sign for somebody with chronic meyloid leukemia*
So as I thought back to a month ago when I had my first bone marrow biopsy and even over the last two and a half years of fighting this joker, emotions began to rise, tears started to fall.
It's annoying. I don't know why I have to be such a "unique case" (although I have always seemed to be different than those around me) but I hope that God is able to use me and my story to help some people find hope and life through whatever they are dealing with. I am waiting for healing in a way that the only explanation can be "God did it."
As I am trying to fall asleep (unsuccessfully) I am reminded of Paul in the New Testament: here is a guy who after encountering Jesus left behind his entire life's work in Judaism to follow the Savior. His entire life changed. He was suddenly different from what he used to be and different from his old friends. Through this shift and change, God used Paul to spread the Good News of Salvation to the world, and more specifically to those who had been told before that there was no way to be made right with God. He was able to share Life (salvation, Jesus) with many through his "unique case." He left his life's work to follow after the very thing he was so desperately trying to put an end to: Christ's church.
So even as I am dreading the drill and needle going into my hip tomorrow and the uncomfortable feeling I will have the next couple weeks I find joy in the idea that through all I am going through I can bring hope and life to others. And this is true life: Jesus Christ came from heaven, fully man and fully God, and gave his own life as the ransom for all who believe and follow him. We were separated from God because of our disobedience but because the debt was paid we can have life forever with our Creator and Father.
Update: my primary doctor treated me for migraines and I haven't had to deal with that the past week or so. I am thinking I was getting a little stressed which caused the headache to start.
Friday, August 23, 2013
Keep your head up son
So first I would like to say "wowza." I did not expect to get so many views. I don't know if the number will stay up as you realize my writing is nothing to be dazzled by but I guess I will keep going.
So most everyone gets headaches from time to time, right? Usually you can pinpoint a reason or a cause for the pain, but for the past 2 weeks I have had a headache that has been constant. I can't pinpoint a cause and it different than a normal old headache. Saw my nurse practitioner and had a CT scan but everything looked normal.
The other day as I was home alone trying to clean up the house, the pain got so annoying and I was so tired of it I cried out to Jesus (yet again). Then as I sat in silence I felt like the Spirit was saying to me, "Keep your head up son, the pain won't last forever."
Now I am not usually one to hear "the voice of God" or to know that God was clearly talking to me, but in the silence and in my pain and in the midst of another reminder of my need for a Father and Creator and Healer I felt that God had heard me yelling out- calling on His son- and He answered simply.
I know there are many people out the in pain of all sorts from physical hurt or abuse or disease or sickness to emotional damage cause by others or a number of other things that cause pain in life like the death of a loved one. Whatever it may be people are hurting and God is saying "Keep your head up son, the pain won't last forever. Wipe away your tears my dear, I will console you."
Here is the point that matters- whether I am healed of the cancer or if it kills me, I am going to serve my God because He created me and loved me so much that His son (Jesus Christ) gave his life in place of mine. You see, I had been separated from my maker because of my disobedience and the price for that was my life, Jesus gave his life in my place and yours.
Colossians 1:21-23 Once you were alienated from God and you were enemies with him in your minds, which was shown by your evil actions. But now he has reconciled you by his physical body through death, to present you before God as a people who are holy, faultless, and without blame. But you need to remain well established and rooted in faith and not shift away from the hope given in the good news that you heard. This message has been preached throughout all creation under heaven. And I, Paul, became a servant of this good news.
So most everyone gets headaches from time to time, right? Usually you can pinpoint a reason or a cause for the pain, but for the past 2 weeks I have had a headache that has been constant. I can't pinpoint a cause and it different than a normal old headache. Saw my nurse practitioner and had a CT scan but everything looked normal.
The other day as I was home alone trying to clean up the house, the pain got so annoying and I was so tired of it I cried out to Jesus (yet again). Then as I sat in silence I felt like the Spirit was saying to me, "Keep your head up son, the pain won't last forever."
Now I am not usually one to hear "the voice of God" or to know that God was clearly talking to me, but in the silence and in my pain and in the midst of another reminder of my need for a Father and Creator and Healer I felt that God had heard me yelling out- calling on His son- and He answered simply.
I know there are many people out the in pain of all sorts from physical hurt or abuse or disease or sickness to emotional damage cause by others or a number of other things that cause pain in life like the death of a loved one. Whatever it may be people are hurting and God is saying "Keep your head up son, the pain won't last forever. Wipe away your tears my dear, I will console you."
Here is the point that matters- whether I am healed of the cancer or if it kills me, I am going to serve my God because He created me and loved me so much that His son (Jesus Christ) gave his life in place of mine. You see, I had been separated from my maker because of my disobedience and the price for that was my life, Jesus gave his life in my place and yours.
Colossians 1:21-23 Once you were alienated from God and you were enemies with him in your minds, which was shown by your evil actions. But now he has reconciled you by his physical body through death, to present you before God as a people who are holy, faultless, and without blame. But you need to remain well established and rooted in faith and not shift away from the hope given in the good news that you heard. This message has been preached throughout all creation under heaven. And I, Paul, became a servant of this good news.
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Here goes nothing
Well here I go trying something new, we will just have to wait and see how long this lasts. I feel like this can be a way for me to share how God is being awesome in my life. For the past couple years I have had grand ideas come to mind on ways to share my story of God's greatness but in the chaos of life I have never followed through. So I see this as my outlet, my way to update others on my current status and share what God is doing.
Here we go...
This is just a little intro and many questions will be answered as I go.
Let's go back a couple years (#throwbackthuraday ya'll!) to 2011. On February 28 I was in the ER for what I thought was vertigo only to be told "you have leukemia" cml to be more specific. Now over the past two years of fighting we are back to square one. As if it were a board game and I drew the dreaded "return to start" card.
The medications which I have taken for two years have helped control the cancer but they haven't really been as successful as hoped. These meds kept the cancer in check but never got me into remission. The most recent side effect, which caused us to discontinue treatment for now, was a low platelet count. Now for those who don't know- platelets are the part of the blood that stop bleeding. When they are too low it can obviously cause major problems. So now we are waiting for my platelets to rise to a safer level before moving forward with treatment.
In the past couple weeks I have had to get some tests done including a bone marrow biopsy to check that there was nothing besides the cml going on. This procedure was supposed to take 5 minutes but due to my "cement-like" bones, it took 2 nurse practitioners over 30 mins to get what wasn't quite enough of a sample. That was two weeks ago and I am still stiff and a little sore from it.
Now I am just waiting...
For my platelets to come up.
To hear what my doctor wants to do next.
But ultimately to see what God is going to do through all this.
I don't want pity, I don't want to be treated differently because I have cancer. I want God to be magnified through whatever comes my way.
I hope that as you read my posts that you will be encouraged and amazed by what God has done and what he will be doing.
Colossians 1:15-20 The Son is the image of the invisible God,the one who is first over all creation, Because all things were created by him:both in the heavens and on the earth,the things that are visible and the things that are invisible.Whether they are thrones or powers,or rulers or authorities,all things were created through him and for him. He existed before all things,and all things are held together in him. He is the head of the body, the church,who is the beginning,the one who is firstborn from among the deadso that he might occupy the first place in everything. Because all the fullness of God was pleased to live in him, and he reconciled all things to himself through him—whether things on earth or in the heavens.He brought peace through the blood of his cross.
Here we go...
This is just a little intro and many questions will be answered as I go.
Let's go back a couple years (#throwbackthuraday ya'll!) to 2011. On February 28 I was in the ER for what I thought was vertigo only to be told "you have leukemia" cml to be more specific. Now over the past two years of fighting we are back to square one. As if it were a board game and I drew the dreaded "return to start" card.
The medications which I have taken for two years have helped control the cancer but they haven't really been as successful as hoped. These meds kept the cancer in check but never got me into remission. The most recent side effect, which caused us to discontinue treatment for now, was a low platelet count. Now for those who don't know- platelets are the part of the blood that stop bleeding. When they are too low it can obviously cause major problems. So now we are waiting for my platelets to rise to a safer level before moving forward with treatment.
In the past couple weeks I have had to get some tests done including a bone marrow biopsy to check that there was nothing besides the cml going on. This procedure was supposed to take 5 minutes but due to my "cement-like" bones, it took 2 nurse practitioners over 30 mins to get what wasn't quite enough of a sample. That was two weeks ago and I am still stiff and a little sore from it.
Now I am just waiting...
For my platelets to come up.
To hear what my doctor wants to do next.
But ultimately to see what God is going to do through all this.
I don't want pity, I don't want to be treated differently because I have cancer. I want God to be magnified through whatever comes my way.
I hope that as you read my posts that you will be encouraged and amazed by what God has done and what he will be doing.
Colossians 1:15-20 The Son is the image of the invisible God,the one who is first over all creation, Because all things were created by him:both in the heavens and on the earth,the things that are visible and the things that are invisible.Whether they are thrones or powers,or rulers or authorities,all things were created through him and for him. He existed before all things,and all things are held together in him. He is the head of the body, the church,who is the beginning,the one who is firstborn from among the deadso that he might occupy the first place in everything. Because all the fullness of God was pleased to live in him, and he reconciled all things to himself through him—whether things on earth or in the heavens.He brought peace through the blood of his cross.
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